This is the podpost for my yet, but soon, to be released episode on menstruation. Yes, you read that correctly. I recorded an episode on your period (assuming you, the reader, are a woman). I happen to find female flow an interesting topic, maybe because I learned so much about it before I got pregnant with Amelia since, you know, it’s pretty essential to the whole having a baby thing. Plus, I like to know how things work. I thought of the topic for this episode ages ago, long before the Republican primary circus started, so I had no intention of being timely. However, the brouhaha over birth control, and for some reason in this country birth control is synonymous with hormonal contraception like the pill, got me thinking about what a feminist stance against birth control would look like. Sure, the conservative right, ahem Rush Lamebaugh (you can groan at that), is framing the debate rather oddly, and I don’t even want to go into that well-worn territory, but is hormonal birth control also anti-feminist even as feminists reassert our right to it? BTW, I classify myself as a feminist, so I’m not using the word negatively.
Podposts
I’m mixing things up by writing the podpost before releasing the relevant podcast episode. This is the podpost for Podcast Episode 37: Two Under Two. The episode is still in post-production, a fancy way of saying we recorded it, but I haven’t edited it yet. Dave and I talk about life as parents with two kids under two years of age. Henry is three months old, so we are still extremely new at the two kid thing, but the learning curve for any child is steep, and three months can seem like three years in parenting time.
This is a podpost for Podcast Episode 36. Does having children make people less happy than those without? Short answer, yes. Long answer, it depends on how many children you have, whether you are a man or woman, how happiness is defined, and whether any of these studies that attempt to quantify happiness can be taken seriously.
Disregarding the general merits of studies that have people express their level of happiness in multiple choice form, the findings that children do not necessarily make people happy should not be shocking to any new parent (and I happen to be one). Babies scream a lot. They poop a lot. They NEED NEED NEED all the time and all they can give is the occasional super cute coo and cuddle. Toddlers scream a lot. They poop a lot (not always in a diaper). They NEED NEED NEED all the time and all they can give in return is the occasional hug, kiss, and super cute ballerina twirl.
This week’s Podpost for Podcast Episode 33 is courtesy of Melitsa Avila who is part of an Air Force military family. She is busy raising three smiley active boys, one bouncy dog, and lots of dust bunnies currently in the UK. She writes about everyday play activities for the under 5′s and is the host of an Early Years radio show about Raising Playful Tots.
We’ve moved a few times as a military family. We’re in our ninth home. We love to travel but not to move. Who would? When you switch continents you have all your electricals that work in one country and now won’t work in another. Furniture is meant for your living room or outside porch and not wrapped, taped, shipped and taken thousands of miles. They won’t all make it and won’t necessarily fit in your new home.
You’re life is packed up along with your memories and sanity. You hope and pray that most stay intact at the other end. There are lots of military spouses at home with their little ones doing their best while their partners are serving their country away from home on a deployment or remote tour.
We’re in the trenches, but in a different way.
Learning to value
Perspective is a wonderful thing and having listened to a recent military edition episode of This American Life, I could totally understand the young wife’s perspective. It’s crystal clear why military members stick together in groups for support, as we understand each other. What struck me about her story and the other stories is the need (as military spouses) to tell our stories to a wider community.
Helping the children
This is what we’ve tried to do with our children as we moved them around with us.
- Take pictures of everyday actions in your home before you move. Photographs tell stories, especially for those too little to remember and with time we all forget.
- Enjoy maps- make placemats of maps and areas where you live, have lived, and where family live. Distance is much shorter when you can see it on a map.
- Play. Use everyday objects and find an opportunity to play. Post it notes and paper you’ll always find and can use.
- Reminders: photograph screen savers of times past serve as a reminder of the good, the funny, and the serious.
- Remember your rituals and routines and keep as many of them as possible. It grounds everyone when you’re in that (new) stressful mode.
- Know your story. Children didn’t have to say their city or explain where they lived in quite the same way when they lived in the previous country or place. But now that insignificant town or major city means different things. They’ll be telling their story a lot in the beginning so help them fashion it into something easy and clearly understood by adult or child.
- Invite over new playmates from playgroups, nursery, daycare, school, church as soon as possible. None of us feel like we belong in a new place until we can tell you the names of our new friends.
Our impressions matter to our children. Our positive outlook and take on the situation impacts how they see themselves and this new place. This will mean we have to be honest with ourselves and prepare our relationships and attitudes before we leave and adjust as we arrive. It means we maintain relationships and friendships from the past as well as look to new ones.
If you know of a military spouses in your community, especially if their partners are deployed or on a remote tour, reach out to them. They may be a long way from home and they would probably love to tell you their story.
In Podcast Episode 32: Feeding Your Toddler, my cousin Abby and I wax on about our feeding philosophies. We aren’t experts, but we are mothers of a toddler and, in my case, a pre-toddler. Although I’d like to think personal experience counts for a lot, I know it isn’t everything (which perhaps is something too many parents forget). Here are some of the sources Abby and I reference in the episode so that you can make your own informed decision about how you plan on feeding your toddler. If I have learned anything from the reaction to my Mamapedia post about Vitamin D, it has been that nutrition is a hot button issue in the mommy world. Moms don’t like their routines and philosophies questioned. For that reason, I’m shelving my opinion for a moment (yes, this is rare) and just pointing you to other people’s ideas, in no particular order.
When trying to think of a Podpost topic for Podcast Episode 31: The Duchess, I considered writing about child custody in the 18th century or divorce or women in politics or motherhood, but ultimately decided the best way to put ourselves in Georgiana’s shoes is to literally look at her shoes. Here are some pictures of Georgiana, the Duke (no, not John Wayne), and Bess. Disclaimer: I’ve tried to find blogsafe photos, but I apologize if I’m stepping on anyone’s copyright toes.
